How Control Freaks Ruin A Good Vibe

One huge challenge of having to deal with a controlling partner, friend, or family member is the special talent they have for steamrolling over everything, and everyone and killing a good vibe. This has to do with respect for individuality, and their lack thereof.

In our relationships, there will be times when we function as a partnership or team, and other times when we stay autonomous. Sometimes we unintentionally step on each other’s toes in trying to find that balance between “we” and “me”.

One huge challenge of having to deal with a controlling partner, friend, or family member is the special talent they have for steamrolling over everything, and everyone and killing a good vibe. This has to do with respect for individuality, and their lack thereof.

In our relationships, there will be times when we function as a partnership or team, and other times when we stay autonomous. Sometimes we unintentionally step on each other’s toes in trying to find that balance between We and Me.

There are many things to band together in support of. You might decide that a certain social cause of the day is worth your time as a joint effort. Maybe there’s a community project that you’d like to be involved with.

Groupthink impacts us

It could be as simple as likes, preferences, sense of style, and decisions about what to do with your time. In groups, controlling people have a way of steamrolling everyone else, especially a partner, in their insistence for having things their own way and getting others to follow along and do what they do or say what they say. 

One habit that people with controlling personalities seem to have is that they always seem to be on a mission to recruit others to support their cause or mission of the day. They also have a way of jumping the gun before other people have been given a chance to decide if these goals and actions are in support of what they themselves want.

Why controlling do what they do

It could be something to do with having a large ego and big opinions to match. Some people because extremely wrapped up in their own personal agenda. Controlling personality types have trouble with empathy and embracing another person’s point of view. At best, they might begin to understand the wishes and motivations of someone else just enough to become skilled at manipulating that person. But controlling people generally embrace a “my way or the highway” attitude toward life. So if you find yourself tangled up with a controlling person, don’t be too surprised if they start to speak on your behalf, in a way that you don’t find yourself agreeing with. They’ve lumped you into their category of BS, and are now using your good name to propagate their own agenda by dragging you into the plan and throwing your name around.

Next: Confronting A Manipulator: Good Idea or Bad Idea? | Previous: Why People Enable Controlling Behavior