You may love the idea of self-coaching yourself using a variety of learning materials and self-study tools. However, what if you’re already so booked up with your daily to-do list that you don’t feel like you’ll be able to add self-coaching on top of everything else? That’s where self-coaching for busy people comes in.
The Downside of Self-Coaching
Self-coaching, like anything, has a downside that you have to deal with. You want to embark on an independent plan for personal development. You also know that making changes in your life takes effort. So, what happens during those times when you lose focus and lack the perseverance and discipline needed to reach your goals?
Here is how to cope with the hurdles to self-coaching that you may run into.
Low Energy
Sometimes we become plagued with fatigue or seem to lack the enthusiasm we once had for putting plans in place and taking action. What should you do when your self-coaching agenda takes a nosedive?
Finding Energy
At times when we lack energy, it can be useful to determine the source of how we feel. Did we run out of motivation because of something someone said or did not say? Is a person getting in the way of our goals? It is true that some people in our lives cheer us on no matter what while others operate as naysaying pessimists who deflate our mood and would destroy our motivation if given the opportunity. Why are people like this? Perhaps a better question is why do we care? One way to guard yourself against people who bring you down is to avoid speaking to them about your plans to self-coach your way to greater achievement. You certainly do not need to share with everyone, and the choosier you become and to who you divulge your private plans, the happier and more successful you will be.
Another reason why we may lack energy is that we are overbooked and wearing ourselves out. One important component of self-coaching is eliminating that which no longer serves us. If you find yourself bogged down by obligations, then that points to a need for clearing. What will you get rid of to make room for greater pursuits that satisfy a personal need for you?
Lack of energy can also be the result of poor health habits. Maybe the foods that you are making a part of your daily diet do not provide the nutrition to support your need for energy. You might be eating too much junk food or perhaps simply eating too much. Take a day or so to assess your daily food intake to see what types of changes you can make that will increase your energy levels so you can approach your personal goals with renewed vigor.
Lack of Accountability
Self-coaching may become difficult at those times when you really need an accountability partner to handhold you through a particular struggle. What happens when you don’t have a coach to guide you, but you were working on making needed changes in your life and now it is time to reach out to a human being?
Let’s say that you are going through a painful breakup or struggling in a marriage that has gone bad. At times like this, stress levels are at an all-time high. You feel overwhelmed with too many decisions and unsure of which way to turn. In this case, it is hard to muster up the stamina and focus to self-coach your way through such a devastating situation.
Find Your Tribe
Self-coaching can feel like a solitary practice, but it certainly does not have to be. You might think that because you aren’t partnering with a life coach or success coach or some other kind of coach, you’re all alone in your personal work to make your life better and live the way that you want.
This is not so at all. To find support, you may have to look in some different places than you may be used to. There are so many wonderful people, experts who can teach you things, friends waiting to offer support, people who have been there and who can help you get where you want to go. The internet makes it happen.
Options to keep you accountable
Family
Let’s start with your family. Are they supportive of your goals and dreams? Family may not see eye to eye with us on priorities. But if you have a sibling, cousin, or other family member that is the right fit for the partnership, you will have help reaching your goals and an opportunity to strengthen a familial relationship.
It’s okay if you don’t have a family member that fits the bill. In fact, it’s fairly typical. Shared history and complicated family dynamics can hinder progress. The last thing you want to do is put a wet blanket on your aspirations. Let’s move on to other alternatives to support taking your life to the next level.
Groups
Join a network of like-minded individuals. One of the most affordable and effective ways to stay focused on your goals is to find people who share the same goals as you do. Seek out people who share the same priorities. These may be folks who want to learn the same things as you do, or maybe they’re on a similar track and have made some progress… so they can teach you what they know. Here are some examples of online communities. We are in no way associated with them.
- Inspire.com: Family and Caregivers
- Reddit.com: Relationship Advice
- Meetup.com: Dating and Relationships
- Quilt App: Various
- Check your county’s website for different support groups
Employee Assistance Programs
Don’t forget to check out what your workplace offers. Employee assistance programs (EAPs) often can provide a list of resources available to you. Many employers have health and wellness programs, groups, and periodic challenges inside the organization as part of their EAP and for overall employee health. Look for commiseration among your peers. Seek out support from a group of individuals who share the same struggles as you do.
Social Media. Find an influencer or expert on social media in your area of interest. Begin following that person. Become a part of their community by participating in their live streams, commenting on posts, and sliding into their DMs. It can be a mutually beneficial relationship. If you need more support than what the social media interactions offer, chances are, they will have affordable offers within their network for more support that won’t take a huge hit to your pocketbook. So, find someone you can admire and learn from.
Most people who are on a similar journey as you will be excited and eager to share information with you as well as offer encouragement and support. This is something we are blessed with in the internet age that is readily available. All you have to do is seek them out and start participating. In fact, wonderful friends can be made this way who share your zest for living and wish to make improvements.
Lack of Time
Bringing about change in your life takes time. If your schedule is already so full from your daily responsibilities, you struggle with how to squeeze in self-coaching on top of your already full plate.
Finding Time
The fact is, we make time for the things that are important to us. So, the best way to prioritize a self-coaching initiative is to do a quick run-down of our existing day-to-day activities. Become aware of how you spend your precious hours. Once you do, you’ll have a clear picture of what types of activities can be reduced or eliminated to help you squeeze in the things that will bring meaning to your life and help you grow as a person.
If you’re trying to get your time back to fill it with meaningful things, activities, and people, then try the below strategies to help you clear your calendar for self-coaching.
Journal your day’s activities. You won’t have to do this forever, just long enough to get a good sense of where your time is going and what you’re putting all your effort into that can perhaps be delegated, cut down drastically, or even eliminated.
Start paying attention to how long it takes to accomplish certain tasks. You may have some things that you just can’t budge on in terms of how you spend your time and whether they are any free moments left for self-coaching at the end of it all. But once you know that it takes an hour and a half to do a load of laundry, 40 minutes to cook dinner, one hour to buy groceries, and so forth… you can look for time savers to help you trim hours off your weekly workload.
Become aware of which activities seem to waste your time. Stop giving away your energy to these things. Maybe you spend far too long coupon cutting, only to purchase things your family doesn’t even really need.
Look for the time-saving shortcut. Can you outsource something? Perhaps now is a good time to involve your growing children in the daily housework. Think about making it a double shot of life skills when you use cash payment as an incentive to get them to do certain jobs. What about combining tasks as a way for you to save time? You may find that once you double up on dinner duty and dress for work in the morning, it eventually becomes second nature to toss that meal into the crock pot well in advance of tonight’s dinner.
Conclusion
If you are opting to coach yourself to a better way of living and relating and working, there are many places to go and options to turn to. Start by thoroughly researching one area of interest that you want to pursue in your life.
Remember that support can come from a variety of places, some of which you may not have expected but nevertheless will prove useful and deliver the type of guidance and comfort you may need at this time.
You’ll be amazed at how much time is wasted in a day. It’s easier to make time for self-coaching than you may have ever imagined.
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